Funny of the day!!

Darned clever, those Canadians?

America should consider changing their currency too!

Due to the global war on terrorism, many terrorist organizations have had their finances frozen. Consequently, they have resorted to counterfeiting.

The Canadians have decided to redesign their currency to prevent the radical Islamic terrorist, from even touching it? Islam derides female nudity.

It is also hoped that this will have a positive effect on tourism



*Swiped from Ol Broad* Somehow I dont feel to bad, since I got the same email from Mr Ol Broad :)

Funny of the day!

My ex-wife started taking flying lessons about the time our divorce started and she got her license shortly before our divorce was final; later that same year.

Yesterday afternoon, she narrowly escaped injury in the aircraft she was piloting when she was forced to make an emergency landing in Southern Tennessee because of bad weather. Thank God our kids were with me at the Beach House this weekend.

The NTSB issued a preliminary report, citing pilot error: Judy was flying a single engine aircraft in IFR (instrument flight rating) conditions while only having obtained a VFR (visual flight rating) rating.

The absence of a post-crash fire was likely due to insufficient fuel on board. No one on the ground was injured.

Photographs below were taken at the scene show the extent of damage to her aircraft, She was very lucky.






AIRCRAFT CRASH

News of the day!!

So if your a reader of my blog.. ya know, all 5 of you..which I am grateful by the way :) Anyway.. Im sure you saw the post about my buddy Elvis, and remember the picture of us in the studio... And you will also remember in that post.. I plugged our myspace page.. Anyway.. I get a call tonight for Elvis.. and the words "your never going to believe this" come out of his mouth.. this is always a scary phrase.. He told me that he got a email today from a DJ in Australia .. Now this has my attention.. He then tells me.. "We need to put a disc together this weekend".. ummm, ofcourse you know I asked why?.. Apparently this DJ heard some of the songs we have listed.. and wants a cd from us, so he can play our music on his show.... Ofcourse we are excited about this!!! So I guess we will be spending the weekend trying to put together our best stuff and sending it off! The next question out of my mouth was, "How are we going to know that he is actually playing our music".. Elvis told me that the DJ told him in the follow up email.. when he would be on, gave us the website so we could listen online, and would even shoot us an email to let us know when he was going to play our stuff.. Once again, very exciting stuff!

Theres a new "Bum" in town..

As most of you already know.. Wade Phillips has been named the new head coach of the Cowboys.. Why? Is this the best Jerry could do?? Please tell me this isnt another Dave Campo, Mr Jones!!! For those of you who dont know Wade.. let me give you some background on him.. He comes to us from San Diego.. were he ran one tough 3-4 defense.. this is the only bright point I can offer at this point.. Oh and for those of you who remember the "Luv Ya Blue" days.. when Houston had the Oilers.. His daddy is Bum Phillips.. Wade has made previous stops in Denver, and Buffalo as a head coach.. Some ESPN experts say this is a good hire for us.. The same ESPN experts told us that Mike Williams was the best talent in the draft a few years ago.. And he is now of the verge of being cut by Detroit.. *sigh* Oh Mel.. Your scouting is wonderful!! I guess only time will tell if this was a smart hire, or just another attempt for Jones to coach the team from his suite.. Please Mr Jones, dont make Wade Phillips another puppet for the Cowboys.. You have a roster full of talent.. Silent E.. would love to hear your thoughts on this :)

Wives celebrate around the world....

Thats right ladies and gentleman.. The football season is giving us one final death rattle as we speak.. The Pro Bowl.. A week long paid vacation in Hawaii.. must be tough right?? I say again, Wives around the world are dancin in the streets.. I know my wife is!! When I came home from watching the Superbowl.. she was doing the snoopy dance.. because she knew by the look on my face.. Football season was over.. Thats ok.. April is right around the corner... DRAFT DAY!!!

If you need a laugh!

We have all been there.. Your sitting at your table, and the bill has arrived.. Your trying to rate your servers performance.. Was your order correct? Did they keep your drink glass full? Which is a big factor in my tip scale, might I add.. So you pay your bill.. tip included and you leave.. Well if your server is not happy with your tip, and they have internet access.. You just may end up on this site.. Thats right.. there is acutally a site for waitstaff to tell the world, just what a cheapskate you are! Now this wont stop me from tipping according to service.. but it was interesting to find out how just how cheap some of our favorite celebrities are.. Enjoy.. The wife and I sure did..

http://www.stainedapron.com/celebs.htm

Im back :)

So I took a week off from my blog.. due to varous reasons.. Superbowl, Trip to El Paso for work.. getting stuck in El Paso for an additional day.. and then catching up on DVR'ed shows with the wife... Now Im back, and ready to blog..

Sports Lunatic Strikes Again!

Now my mother-in-law has defined me as a "Sports Lunatic".. which I will not deny this fact.. The pictures above represent about a month of planning, and alot of luck.. My buddy Elvis is the biggest Dallas Stars Fan there is.. So when Christmas time came around.. My buddy Pat and I were trying to figure out what we should get him.. Pat works for the Stars, he runs a proshop at one of the centers here.. Pat calls me and tells me that he got an "AllStar" Helmet in.. because the AllStar game was here this year.. He said it was pretty slick.. I said ok.. we can do that.. Then I said "wouldnt it be cool if we could get it signed by the 4 Stars that are on the ballot this year.. Zubie, Modono, Turco, and Morrow.. He said.. it would be, but I cant ask for autographs, being an employee... He then said.. they have open practice here.. you can stand in line, and see what you can get.. I said that will work.. just tell me when.. So I took the day off work, and headed to Frisco to meet Pat at 8:30 am.. So we meet.. and then quickly realize we didnt have a sharpie.. so we ran over to Target and picked one up, along with a cup of coffee... Head back over to the rink.. Then I get a call, my assistant lost her keys to the office, so we had to run back down to Dallas.. About a 30 minute drive.. Unlock the office.. Then off we go back to Frisco.. We sat and watch the Stars practice.. which was very cool.. I wandered out to the area where the players will be leaving the locker room.. to secure a spot.. I stood in line for about 2 hours.. and am glad to report that we won the good fight.. I got 24 of 26 signatures on this helmet.. Now remember... I was only after 4.. I must say, as this helmet started filling up.. I began to drool.. and ponder keeping the helmet for myself.. Pat derailed that train of thought rather quickly.. We leave practice.. and I head to my card shop that I frequent to buy a case.. I get this helmet home.. I then have StaCee wrap up the case and then the helmet.. Pat arrives.. We call Elvis.. Elvis comes over, and we give him the case to unwrap.. He looks at it.. and must be thinking.."What the hell is this"?? Then we give him the helmet.. he unwraps it, and is speechless.. Then the tears come.. He first thought we bought the helmet.. Then we tell him that we stood in line to get this signed for him.. He still cant believe, along with all the people standing in line, that we would do that for him.. He has already been told that he will be getting sticks of gum as Christmas presents from us for the next 5 years

My Local BestBuy!!

I am happy to report that I now have my laptop back. It only took about 2 weeks to ship to its maker, have them replace the cd/dvdr drive, and ship back.. but HEY when the the invoice says "$0 Balance Owed" who am I to complain.. I wish the maker would have cleaned it up abit.. because it came back dirtier then when it left.. but once again I cant complain.. What I can complain about is the service I received at my local BestBuy AGAIN!!! I get a call from the Geek Squad this morning, I answer the cell.. they hang up on me??? I get back to my office.. My Assistant tells me.. BestBuy called, and your laptop is ready.. *sigh*.. I just passed my local BestBuy.. So off I go to my local BestBuy... stand in line behind someone who wasnt quite sure she wanted to upgrade to Windows Vista.. but apparently had money burning a hole in her pocket.. because it was how much is this, and how much is that.. I get to the counter, I am asked "can I help you" indicating to me that this young man is ready to give me his undivided attention, YEAH RIGHT! Customer service is a dying art in this country.. His cell phone rings, and I have to stand there for 5 minutes and be told to hold on, while this young man relives his night out, and how durnk he got, and the fact that he was to drunk to get laid, by some willing girl he took home.. I then asked the man to lean alittle closer.. he did, I took the phone out of his hand, then told the caller.. He will call have to call you right back.. he is at work, and is busy with a customer... and I hang up the phone.. and place it on the counter!! Now the line of people that had formed behind me.. also waiting on Geek Squad begin to clap.. This young man, in disbelieve then turns to me and said "That was the rudest thing I have ever seen" I reply.. "You should have been on this end".. "Now can you please help me out here".. He then asks me "What the F**k can I help you with" "2 things.. I need to pick up my laptop, and I need to speak to your manager".. He disappears in the back for about 5 minutes.. when he returns.. His manager is by his side.. His manager turns to me and says "My employee here tells me you assaulted him".. WHAT??? EXUSE ME?? I have a line of people behind me that saw the whole thing.. but if I did, please by all means call the police.. but if your employee wants to call the cops, I will beat the hell outta him until the cops show up.. Did he happen to mention the fact he was on a personal call, on his cell phone about his drunken evening, and not getting laid because he was too drunk, and I was asked to hold on until he was done??? The manager then turns to this young man, and asked "is this true"?? I was very impressed, this young man acutally said.. yes this is true.. The manager did his best impression of Donald Trump.. and said "Your Fired" and even did the hand motion..Fired this kid on the spot.. Now I felt bad that this young man lost his job at this point, but this feeling fades away like a sunset when I leave the store and am confronted by him in the parking lot... which I kinda figured was coming.. This young man told me he should beat the hell outta me right here.. I told him if he really wanted to get his ass kicked, then I wouldbe happy to help him out.. I told him I hope you learned a lesson today son.. The customers that you put on hold, and dismiss... PAY YOUR SALARY!!!

Needless to say.. I prolly wont be going back to my local BestBuy.. Thats ok.. I wont shed a tear.. Ill just go 5 minutes further down the road.. and go to Frys.. They are cheaper.. and I already know Im going to be treated like crap when I go in there!!! :)